Authentic Behaviors. Intoxicating Insights.

Windows 8: Operating Under the Influence

Following the release of Windows 8, we wasted no time in trying out Microsoft’s new operating system on a drunken subject. Jennifer, a 40-year-old mother of 2, is an active consumer of PCs, software and alcohol. She agreed to sit down with us the afternoon following the product’s launch to share her thoughts on Windows 8, all while imbibing several rounds of her favorite tequila.


  • The Start screen was overwhelming. The tiles’ functions, fonts and photos were unclear.
  • She searched in vain for conventions, often punching the Esc key to no avail.
  • She resented the omnipresence of Microsoft properties, like IE and Bing, referencing “Big Brother” and “Ass”.
  • She frequently expressed a feeling of being trapped, powerless and “in retreat”.

Any new operating system will be difficult for a first time user, whether drunk, sober or just a bit slow. It is possible Jennifer will eventually learn how to use the software. But it is doubtful that, even the morning after, she’ll ever fully recover from her initial impression of Windows 8 as a confusing buzzkill.